12/06/2026
This post hit me hard because...
It used to be me.
After my divorce at 25, I didn't just become a mother.
I became the father too.
I was constantly placing my daughter's needs above my own.
And being an only child, I naturally took on the responsibility of caring for my mother too.
Somewhere along the way, everyone else's needs came first.
Mine came last.
Over time, people became used to it.
Berniec will handle it.
Berniec will figure it out.
Berniec will take care of it.
And from the outside, people admired me.
They called me capable.
Independent.
Strong.
A superwoman.
But deep inside?
I didn't want to be a superwoman.
I just wanted to be a 小女人.
I remember saying that once in a WhatsApp group with some close girlfriends.
One of them laughed and replied:
"I think it's easier for you to find a 小男人."
I remember feeling quite upset.
But looking back now, I realised that was simply how people saw me.
Strong.
Independent.
Capable.
The woman who always had everything under control.
Years later, when I met LB, I was fortunate to meet a man who was willing to step up and be the man of the family.
Yet letting him lead wasn't easy.
After carrying everything for so many years, I had become used to being in control.
And perhaps that's the part many women don't talk about.
Sometimes the burden isn't only what we're carrying.
Sometimes it's the fear of letting go.
The fear that things won't be done properly.
The fear that things will fall apart.
But over the years, I've slowly learnt to trust.
To let go.
To stop carrying things that were never meant to be carried alone.
And honestly?
I feel lighter.
Much lighter.
Looking back now, I finally understand what the Guan Di disciple meant when he said:
"I see the old you in many of them."
🤍
If this post resonates with you, perhaps ask yourself:
What are you still carrying today that you no longer need to carry alone?
— LBN 🤍
