10/14/2025
I have always enjoyed sharing every single word that God has laid on my heart to share. Every deep wound that was open I wanted to help others find a place of healing. Every single thing that I've ever made was because I wanted to share how even though things are hard, you can get through it. Life was really hard for a long time. I was able to use this as an outlet and a way to keep myself at the feet of Jesus. It kept me grounded. It kept me seeking. And then one day the voices of being not enough got too loud, I started to second guess everything. My marriage was shattered, the relationship that I built my life around was completely out the window. No matter how hard I tried to hold onto it, it was actually destroying me. So as that failed, I felt like every part of my life couldnt’ have been real. Nothing made sense. I felt like everything about my life was just looked at as a failure, and that everyone saw me and only saw that everything I held onto for so long was a lie. I boxed it all up. Took a break. Honestly it wasn't a break, it was survival. I went from being a stay at home mom who worked at our church a few hours a week to finding a full time job so that I could walk into an attorney's office and file for divorce. And I wish my story was as simple as that. But it isn't. I have spent the past 2 years and 2 months fighting to get a divorce. I am working full time while being a single mom full time. I started college in August to work toward my Bachelors in Special Education. I am doing my best to support my kids until the court finally orders for me to have help. Some days when I sit and think about how everything is hard, there's not enough hours in the day, dollars in the bank account or enough patience to make it… I remember one day at a time. I remember so many of the things that I've typed out before or posted before. The things that I was once encouraged by come up in my memories and are the reminders that I still need. I don't think that the plan was ever for me to stop sharing. I think that I was silenced from helping others. There are so many things that God has laid on my heart and I just keep packing them away in my notebook. One day that notebook might just be available to help others get through the same thing. But for now I am hoping that this group can be a soft place for what I share to land and for God to help me provide for my kids.
I thank you all so much and appreciate every bit of support that you all have ever given. And I know most of you know it and if you don't or you just needed reminder, never hesitate to message me if you need to talk, Prayers always 🩷
